.." I'm not complaining!" Harriet laughs."Me either," Laura says with a smile. "I mean yes, it'll take more thanjust this to make me trust her again, but this is a step in the rightdirection." And you get to spend the evening wearing your poshest dress and yourhighest-heeled shoes," Suri giggles, before grimacing and releasing myarm. "Oh... Sorry, Ash..." It's okay," I sigh, even though deep inside, I'm very much not okay. Iopen my mouth to speak again, only to be interrupted when Priya returnsalong with her boyfriend and her brother- neither of whom know about my'secret'."Here you go," Priya says as the two older boys hand soft drinks to allof us."Hey, it's Ashley, isn't it?" The tall Caucasian boy- who I recognise asPriya's boyfriend Carl- says to me."Yeah," I say, shaking Carl's hand."You two HAVE met before," Suri giggles. "You've been going out with meand my sister for over a year!" Carl laughs at Suri's teasing, beforeturning back to face me."Pri says that you've already seen. By doing that my needs are fulfilled - because my deepest need is - to fulfill his needs.I sometimes have a picture of him in my mind when He is 70, tanned and grinning with a sparkle in his eye holding my hand in a beach bar somewhere warm and knowing that his wife has been wearing his chains for over 30 years. I can submit control fully because I trust that He will protect our vanilla identities carefully at all times even when sharing me with others, virtually with images and video footage of me and email exchanges or physically in sessions. > > I am not a slave. Slaves are not free. I am submissive and have freely chosen to abdicate control of my body and mind to my Master. He does not take them from my against my will. I give them to him as a gift with all of my heart, soul and mind and every part of my body. It is beautiful. It feels so right. His gift to me is that He knows how to handle this gift and how to make it flourish. Rather than abuse it, use it up and destroy it He.
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